Defined

Sports escalation: the practice of transitioning from complete novice to adroit specialist with Jedi-like mastery in a new athletic endeavor in one to three episodes of practice, generally requiring the escalator to procure the very highest quality of all associated gear, whether necessary or completely tangential to the activity, between the first and second occurrence of participation in the activity; includes fanatical pursuit of related knowledge (major, minor and mundane) of technique and equipment, with time spent gathering said information exceeding time spent actually engaging in the activity by at least one order of magnitude.

-Conceived, defined and written by Ellie, 21 May 2007


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